Saturday, February 4, 2012

not the best week

It has been longer than usual since my last post, and that is because the house was temporarily converted to a doggy hospice care center. My 17.5-year old poodle, Jinx, started to change last week. She has been sick many times before, but this time was definitely different. She stopped eating, two days later she stopped drinking water, then she stopped moving her back legs.

Last night we made the decision to take her to the vet. An hour before our appointment, she did get up and walk across the room, but she was so confused by her inability to move like she used to. I always thought that on her final car ride I'd be able to give her one last treat to leave her with a happy moment, but she refused everything, and a dog that won't eat peanut butter is surely ready for death.

My mother took this picture this morning, Jinx looked pretty tired. As she lay on her bed for the last time, I couldn't just let her go without having physical proof of her existence. I cut some of her hair, being careful not to change the way she looks. 10 grams of poodle locks with a wide variation in staple length and color. Some day I'll spin it into something soft that reminds me of her. Wrapped in a towel, I held her on the car ride. Jinx was never the type of dog to passively let you carry her, but there was no resistance in her muscles, they were just weak and soft. All of her energy was concentrated on breathing. At the vet, there was some trouble finding a vein for injection, 4 days of refusing water and very little drinking left her extremely dehydrated.  She looked the same after she got her injection as she did before. I stroked her face, and could not imagine that she couldn't feel my hand.

My uncle offered to bury her in his animal cemetery with his past pets (ranging from horses to birds to various rescued creatures). It's a very nice favor, especially because I'm interested in retrieving some of her bones in a few years. I think after I die, I'd like someone in the family to display my skull on a mantlepiece or bookshelf, so I'd like to have Jinx around in that way.

After the vet, she was taken to the farm and buried in her RUN DMC shirt and acid washed diaper cover shorts. She never liked to wear clothes as a young dog, but in her old age she welcomed extra layers of warmth. It just seemed right to leave her as she was and not take away her comfort even though her shirt and pants were reminders of her aging. I have heard that she was buried in her towel, which has my name tag on it too.
I prefer to think of Jinx like this, running outside and chasing squirrels.





3 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry about Jinx, she was beautiful. I know how hard it is to lose a family member. but I'm glad that your able to remeber her in a good way.

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  2. I'm so sorry for your loss. Pets are family. I hope you find comfort.

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